Sometimes I wish I would be still a child, laughing with the smallest, meaningless and unimportant things in life. Feeling happy and satisfied with my hands and face full of dirt cause I was playing in the park. With my only worries and concerns if I convince mom, with my cute little face, to buy me my favorite candy bar. No, it is not that I hate responsibilities and adulting. It is just more fun to be a child!

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ShoesΒ 4thandreckless

I Will Never Grow Up

My mom always keeps saying ” You are not a child anymore, you are 27! Grow up! Find a man! Get married! ”

With all my respect to my mother and knowing her background I just agree, go to my room and continue my life. Why is adulthood combined with boring suits, 9-5 jobs and bills?

” You have to be serious now! ”, she says.

Not that she is the only one. I have heard many people calling me crazy and weird. Why? Cause I am loud, I chase my dreams, I am not afraid to show my weaknesses, I don’t care what others say and I laugh. I laugh as much as I can, I laugh for no reason, I laugh at myself !

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People nowadays are afraid of smiling, laughing, feeling…..they are afraid of life. What others say, if they can’t satisfy their parents, if they are not the right figure for society, if they are not the same as their friends.

What if you want to spend all your life traveling the world and do whatever it takes to support that. Or what if you don’t want to have a family. Or what if you want to spend your days creating art. Or what if you want to join a charity organization and help people in Africa.

What I am trying to say here is that the connection between adulthood and society is still that strong that anything outside of these borders is labeled different, weird, crazy!

Does it harm you or anyone else? No! Does it affect you? No!

So s@@@t up and let me be the crazy girl with the massive hair, that dances all the time and that is not afraid to start a new dream over and over again.

S@@@t up and let anyone be that crazy, loud, with a strong personality and abnormal ideas person.

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I have the blessing and the curse to talk with many people every day. First of all let’s make it clear that I am trying not to judge anyone and I 99% succeed. After years of my self acceptance fight it was clear that every life in this planet has it’s own journey. I can’t compare my life with your life, I can’t get the same life as you, I can’t feel exactly the same way as you feel. So how can I be able to judge you? I can’t even understand you!

Back to my point, so I see people criticizing one another, throwing knives and causing pain.

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I have been there! I did all of that! I was afraid of anything new, loud, different and I was miserable. I tried to satisfy my parents, I tried to be what society wants, I tried to be invisible! But I broke! My heart and my mind couldn’t take it any more.

So now I don’t care. It is a harsh word to say but it is the truth. I want someone to love me and accept me the way I am. A child with a pure heart and big dreams. Full of mistakes. With insecurities and immature behavior. With the will to absorb any new information like a hoover. With a non stop energy flow. With a precious kindness.

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So as a child if you ask me what I want to be when I grow up, the answer is Β  ” I want to be the most goofy, heroic, special, kind-hearted, fearless version of my childish self!” .

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ShoesΒ 4thandreckless

What do you think? Shall we open new horizons and move on? Or stick to societies norms?

Thank you so much for stopping by,

xoxo

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